Apocalypse-Synching

06Jun06

So, this very special day began in a appropriate-enough fashion:

  1. two of the channels (CNN Headline News and CNBC) on the cardio teevees at the gymnauseam were displaying the exact, same commercial (for Jos. A. Bank, satanic granddad clothiers) at the exact, same time
  2. not two minutes later, CNBC had an item on “the Vonage IPO Debacle” while, simultaneously, CBC Newsworld featured a commercial for… you guessed it: Vonage VoIP. (Conspiracy alert! The acronym for “Vonage IPO” is an anagram of the acronym for “Voice over IP”. Coincidence? Hah!)
  3. if CITY-TV’s Breakfast Television was an SQL database, the query
    SELECT Item
    FROM dbo.BreakfastTelevisionStories
    WHERE (NOT (Summary LIKE ‘%babies%’))
    AND (NOT (Summary LIKE ‘%weddings%’))
    AND (DATE = ‘6/6/2006’)

    would yield no results. None!
  4. this morning I read a comment from Luciferus in which he objects, enthusiastically, to my blanket condemnation of Celtic Knot armband tatts. Rightfully so, because he happens to possess a truly cool Celtic Knot armband tatt and has sported it for many (13) years, well before they became fashionable (and, unfortunately, ubiquitous).
    What sets Luciferus‘ Celtic Knot armband tatt apart from other, lesser, Celtic Knot armband tatts is his inimitable style, the personal meaning of the ink, its formidable size and, well, his dead-sexiness. Dude can pretty-much get away with anything.
    In fact, he’s so dead-sexy…he’s zombie-sexy. Let me go one step further: he brings new meaning to the expression “Get thee behind me, Satan!”


    3 Responses to “Apocalypse-Synching”

    1. 1 Chuck

      BT query: priceless! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

    2. 2 Luciferus

      That’s BETTER. Thanks for the “props,” ” ‘my’ man.”


    1. 1 CITY-TV’s “Breakfast Television” Introduces Full-Scale Infantilization to Local Morning News « This. That. No Other.

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