Actual Gay Conversations #4


A phenomenon I like to call “Inching Toward the Truth”, overheard waiting for the light to change this morning outside Starbucks™:

Queen 1: I just can’t function until I’ve had my morning coffee.

Queen 2: That’s more than just a “coffee”, sweetie, that’s a Caramel Macchiato™.

Queen 1: I know, I just needed to treat myself. It’s been a bitch of a week and I’m up to my tits in Paul Smith™ and I have no idea what I’m going to do with any of it.

Queen 2: Give it to me, girlfriend! Mmmm, this Pomegranate Frappuchino™ is really good today, better than the one yesterday.

Queen 1: I need my caffeine first thing in the morning.

Queen 2: Why don’t you make coffee at home? You have that amazing Gaggia™ machine.

Queen 1: Who has the time?

Queen 2: How much time could it take? 30 seconds to grind, 30 seconds to open up a bottle of Cedar Springs™ and then 5 minutes to make it while you’re getting yourself ready. And you take more like three hours to get ready.

Queen 1: I know, but it’s really tricky to operate.

Queen 2: How tricky can it be? Your idiot boyfriend was able to make great coffee after dinner last week.

Queen 1: Yeah, but the barista at Starbucks™ is way cuter than my boyfriend.

Queen 2: True. There’s the light… I’m off, see you in Yoga™ class tonight!

One Response to “Actual Gay Conversations #4”

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