Roll Up the Rim to Win (the War!)

13Sep06

Roll Up the Rim to Win the War

You know, there’s almost no need to comment on this photo of Canadian Foreign Affairs Minister Peter MacKay “treating” U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice yesterday to a(n embarrassing, paper) cup of (shitty) coffee at that bastion of the Canadian lower-middle-class, Tim Horton’s, after some mutual tongueing over our countries’ shared military presence in Afghanistan.

While Pete checks out the crullers on the server, just look at the tortured, get-me-the-fuck-outta-here expression on the face of the woman who’d rather shop for Ferragamos in NYC than deal with the ravages of Hurricane Katrina.

At least Condi can feel comfortable going out for a cup of coffee in a country in which Saddam Hussein is not in power.



2 Responses to “Roll Up the Rim to Win (the War!)”

  1. 1 AngryCanuck

    Never ever think of suggesting that Tim Horton’s coffee is “Canadian lower-middle-class, paper cup shitty coffee”-You arrogent american bigot. I suppose that seattle knock off of an esspresso is supposedly ‘acceptible’ refreshment for a distingushed person of your stature. I had an Italian friend try some of that Starbucks crap, she found it so revolting, she nearly spat it back in our severs face.

    I do apologize for my abrupt tone, as a Canadian, my coffee is very important. Not to mention Tim Hortons has become so popular in Canada, it is now hand in hand with Canadain culture, almost a national icon. One of which even I have become proud to call ‘truly Canadian.’

    Since my recent move to America, I have noticed fewer differences then I expected, one large difference that I’m having a hard time dealing with is the lack of respect for good coffee. Instant coffee, dunken doughnuts, starbucks and all the other crap that gets passed off as coffee is beginning to make me sick. (not to mention in Florida you can’t get a coffee past 10:00pm, cause everything is closed)

    in closing, please execpt my deepest apologizes for my abruptness, I love America (thats why I moved here), and if anyone would like to insult Canada or Tim Hortons again, I would like to kindly invite them, to gorge themself at there local Krispy Kreme, w/500 calorie doughnuts, in the true gluttonus american tradition of obesity and obsenity, that the rest of world has come to recognize them for.

  2. 2 bstewart23

    What a coincidence! I’m sitting here on my born-in-Winnipeg ass, two blocks from Yonge & Bloor in downtown Toronto, sipping a cup constructed from 80% Hawaiian Kona and 20% President’s Choice “The Great Canadian Coffee”. You just can’t get much more “lower-middle-class” than the latter.

    But I do thank you for your articulate and impassioned defense of Tim Horton’s coffee, especially the commentary on American Coffee Clichés. Your point that Tim’s has welded itself to the Canadian Identity is well-taken and is, actually, my biggest problem with that company. (I’ll leave argument as to the actual quality of the beverage they dispense for another time).

    The Typical Canadians in Tim Horton’s ubiquitous advertising are quirky at best and functionally retarded at worst (though, to be fair, this is a standard Canadian advertising practice). Tim Horton’s Canadian Women are understatedly, girl-next-doory, and almost-pretty. But the Canadian Men exemplified by Tim Horton’s are dopey, unfit, subintelligent, underattractive shlubs.

    And, thanks to the fact that Tim Horton’s is one of only four Canadian advertisers with enough cash to sponsor television programming, their ads have been statistically proven to appear at every television break, repeatedly reinforcing the Canadian Dullard Cliché.

    And, lastly, please do not apologize for abruptness or tone. Those are the kind of comments that make you perfectly welcome here.


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